The past like 2 hours have made me realize how much I really hate it here. Along with the people. I've gone through having so many friends over the past 8 years of my life and now none of them seem to be around. I don't know what it is but they all seem to have disappeared. I see some occasionally but that's only if I go out to a party. Cause that's the "cool" thing to do on the weekends. (As I said in my previous post). I mean granted I'm not a huge party girl but it wouldn't hurt to be asked to go out with everyone. (This weekend not so much due to I'm sickly :( It sucks) I've had 4 different girl "best friends" in the last 8 years.
The first I met the very first day of 7th grade. We were best friends. We did everything together and had a blast. Then college started. We went to the same college so it's not like we were 300 miles away. We were still in the same town at the same place. She seemed to distance herself from me and I don't understand why. I tried to ask her about it a while back and she gave me some stupid excuse of "she just grew up too fast". Well that's bull. I was never in anyways immature (if that's what she was getting at). Now she's happily married and has a kid. Which I am more than happy for her. But I miss our friendship. It also doesn't help that she talks to EVERYONE of my other "friends" other than me. Unless we happen to be in the same room which even then she doesn't really talk to me.
The second- We had known each other for years but never were really good friends until about 12th grade. We realized we had a lot more in common. So we started hanging out all the time. Going to concerts and hanging out with a new group of people all the time. She went to SU and I stayed here so it was a little harder to get ahold of each other at times with our schedules. Eventually we kind of drifted apart which I can't completely blame her for. So I guess that was a mutual thing. I don't know.
The third - I started a new college with a new major and she so happened to be in all my classes. Well.. we too had a lot in common, with interests and music and blah blah blah. Well we literally spent every day with each other. We would be up until 5 AM just bullshitting or hanging out with friends. Welp, eventually she got wicked pissed at me for whatever reason complaining that I am a terrible person and I only care about myself. It completely came out of left field. I didn't know what to say to her. Cause it was the most ridiculous thing I had ever heard.
Then there was another. I met her through my ex-boyfriend at one of his shows. She is such a sweetheart and we loved hanging out together. Well, one night we met a couple of guys which whom we hung out with. She was head-over-heals for the one. And I the other. Well, she ended up not liking the guy as much cause apparently he was too "clingy". Which in my eyes was not the case. He is just one of those hopeless romantics that loves to be around and do anything he possibly can for someone. He also became my best friend while I dated his best friend. Well I was naturally hanging out with my boyfriend and his and I's best friend all the time. Well, she would not hang out with us because of this boy. So she became distant and stopped talking to me. (Which by the way she stole 3 movies of mine and a couple shirts, but that's not that point haha)
There were a few other friends here and there that I hung out with a lot but never can really call them best friends.
I do not trust anyone around here anymore. Everyone seems to be backstabbing, conniving, liars. I've had a few things stolen from me currently from my roommate. Some of which I have gotten back. One of which was taken with her on a trip home to Maryland. (Miss my $50 dress).
I just do not know what it is. I mean why can't anyone be honest anymore. Hence why I am moving down South. Granted things may be a lot different but that is definitely something I am ready for. I need a change in my life.
In the south everything is so much better. My family is there, the weather is better (minus potential hurricanes. EEK!). Just a new atmosphere in which I am always much happier when I visit. I was down to visit this past November. I went to my first NFL game and always met someone while I was down there. Whether or not that will go anywhere is beyond me. But it is nice to have someone that I know there. Along with having family close will be great. I haven't lived near family in 20 years. It will be a great feeling. And I cannot wait till that time.
Planned us a little road trip down to New Orleans. - Joe Nichols "The Shape I'm In"
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